Am I that cruel ?

There were days when people loved to be with me
Morning till evening, sun set till sun rise
People took their opportunity to spend time with me
Thought all their wishes were wise
But whats happening now
People prefer to avoid me in such a way
Those who loved me are far away now
They dont even share their feelings
No matter whether its good or bad
I'm thrown away just because I was so sweet
I'm no more the person people need
I'm no more the support the souls longed
But why do I stil love them
Though harldy we could see each other
What do I need and What do I expect ?
I have got a family which can shower their love
But it is not the love which I'm longing for
Family love is the love which is there for me always
Like me loving myself, it will stay forever
What do I need then ?
A companionship, a lover, a partner
Can't guess what it is ....

How unfortunate things are thrown apart
Am I talking about people or just a person
Probably one person at a time
But its been people all through my lfie
They come in uninvited, stay as long as they preferred
Leave with a world of scars in my heart
And I'm now left broken empty in despair
Want to breathe but can't find air
Thought you were sent from up above
But you and me never had a chance to love
So much more I have to say
Why don't you help me find a way
I wonder if you know
How it really feels
To be left outside all alone
When it is cold out here
Well maybe you should know

When things go down and nobody being around
Life is a full of pain
Wish the whole world breaks apart
Leaving no chance for any life to survive
Am I selfish, certainly not
If I was I would have not let her go
I would have not let me kill myself
I would have not let my love die so early
I would have not been an assasinist
Am I that cruel to kill people
Not really, probably I had killed my love
I had masacred my emotions
So that others could live in peace
But whats a point, in keeping a soul in pain
Just to make thers feel better
Still being cursed as a cheat by someone
Who praised me as a gem of a person
Why I'm everyone's enemy all of a sudden
I know life is full of uncertainities
But why they are all doing dirt to me
Who is cursing me in such a way
Where all I have is nothing but pain
Efforts to make myself happy go in vain
Though its been a habit to go through such a stage
When its all gonna change ?