Tuesday 15 September 2009

Betrayal Outburst

The Wind is blowing hard
money is draining quick
relations splitting out
don't know what to do
asking for favour
from people who can be fooled
clever was his thinking
but also was so cunning
might jump out of problems
will never from the judgement
he who is thinking at heart and brain
will get back those into his vein
trailing the old faith
punishment will be severe
if it takes more time
as the world is coming to an end
moral of men's life going so cheap
people could do anything for their living
killing their own mothers
pimping their children for money

what else they wouldn't do
just to keep their life better
man, i haven't known anything like this
until i was betrayed by him
im not anymore willing to think
as i believe in the nature's will
Tamils getting slaughtered in Srilanka
and those who lost lives in Iraq
also the souls which passed away in Palestine
I should be happy for what im having
wealth and trust might be lost
but definitely not the hope
after all those betrayals
yes Im out of them
I do have my own way
showing them that they are my foot
dusting them to the floors
warning them of the curse
will never enter into their doors
don't know God still exists
if He does, these people should never persist
leaving it to the time's answer
saying my last prayer
Im walking on my own way
towards the spiritual growth
these things aren't real
running after people and money
but the soul is so pure
such things can't even come near
im not in any danger
as my Master would give me shelter
no matter what so ever happen
i will be there in His heaven.

Friday 4 September 2009

Wish I had powers....

Is there anyone to question these men ?



The Great Sri Lankan army. Look what there are doing under peace keeping mission.



This says all about the Sri Lankan army. If they can do this kind of things in Haiti under UN supervision,
Imagine what they can do to Tamils. Many sinhala ppl will still deny this. Many rape cases in Sri Lanka are still unhanded. Why? Their intention is to fight LTTE and save Tamils? Who is going to save the Tamils from this Army?

Monday 24 August 2009

Srilanka a Sinhala country - Are you kidding ?

If you think that Sri Lanka is a SinhalaNadu or a Sinhala country, then please read the following,

THERE WERE NO SINHALESE BEFORE THE 13TH CENTURY AD.

According to the Mahavamsa, Vijay the son of Sinha Bahu (Sinha Bahu`s father was a Sinha/lion) from the Lala country where he established a kingdom and founded a city named Sinhapura is believed to be the forefather of the Sinhalese.

It is said in MAHAVAMSA CHAPTER VII - THE CONSECRATING OF VIJAYA,

**But the king Sihabähu, since he had slain the lion (was called) Sihala and, by reason of the ties between him and them, all those (followers of VIJAYA) were also (called) Sihala.**

The term Sinhala/Sihala is mentioned in the Mahavamsa only twice in the beginning chapters as shown above. After that, the term Sinhala is only found in the Chulavamsa written after the 13th Century AD.

None of the ancient historical Objects/Monuments/Buildings which were in existence or found in the archaeological surveys in Sri Lanka before the 13th Century AD says anything about a Sinhala race or a Sinhala Kingdom or a Sinhala Country or a Sinhala civilization, or a Sinhala culture or a Sinhala language, and none of the Written History, Rock Carvings, stone inscriptions, etc, says anything about a Sinhala race or a Sinhala Kingdom or a Sinhala Country before 13th Century AD.

There never existed a race/ethnic group/nation called Sinhala in Sri Lanka before the 13th century AD, there never existed a kingdom called Sinhala in Sri Lanka before the 13th century AD and Sri Lanka was never known as a Sinhala country throughout history.

The archeologist/historian Prof. S. Paranavitana was a biased researcher who did all his research with a preconceived Sinhala-Buddhist mindset. His findings and assumptions magically supported all the myths found in the Mahavamsa.

Prof. K. Indrapala in his book (pg.19) says,

**the assumption forming the basis of Prof. Paranavitana?s statement is that the people of the kingdom ruled by the Anuradapura kings and the inhabitants of Rohana and other southern chiefdoms were all Sinhalese and that any ruler other than a Sinhalese in control of Anuradapura or other chiefdoms was a foreigner. As will be seen later in this book, such an assumption is not supported by archeological or epigraphical evidence. In the centuries before the Common Era, there were many ethnic groups in the island and one of them was the group known as the Damedas in inscriptions and Damilas in the Pali chronicles, identified without any controversy as the Tamils. Sena and Guttaka, the first Tamils mentioned in the Pali chronicles as having gained power at Anuradapura were from a merchant family and are not even described as invaders.**

According to Prof. R. A. L. H. (Leslie) Gunawardana, a historian/archeologist at the Peradeniya University, there NEVER was a Sinhala race/ethnic group or a Sinhala Kingdom before the 13th CAD. What existed was ONLY a Sinhala dynasty, a ruling linage group. There is NO evidence whatsoever to prove that an ethnic group/race or a kingdom by the name Sinhala existed in Sri Lanka before the 13th CAD. The concept that the Sinhalas were indigenous people or the first to arrive in the island originated only during the colonial and post-colonial period.

In his publication `The People of the Lion: The Sinhala Identity and Ideology in History and Historiography`, Prof. Leslie Gunawardana says,

**Sinhala was a name adopted by a ruling linage group for whose origin the lion myth had been created. He says, contrary to popular belief, in ancient times the Sinhala identity was associated primarily with the dynasty which ruled Anuradapura. He goes even further by saying that, not only the Sinhala kingdom but also the Sinhala ethnic identity (race) in Sri Lanka emerged only after the 13th Century AD. Before that, there never was a Sinhala race or a Sinhala Kingdom, but only a Sinhala royal family (dynasty).**

NOW, WHO SAYS THAT THE SINHALESE HAVE A COUNTRY?

Unfortunately, even the Sri Lankan constitution does not say that Sri Lanka is a Sinhala Country.

Bikku Mahinda and the missinory monks who introduced Buddhism and the Pali/Prakrit language to the Island called the language that existed when they arrived (before 3rd Century BC) as Dipa Basa and still no body knows what this dipa basa was, it can even be ancient Tamil.

It was only some Europeans such as Wilhelm Geiger, who studied the language of the Island (after Buddhism was introduced) in depth and divided the newly developing language into many phases. Later, he came up with the following name labels.

Prakrit-Sinhala (3rd Century BC - 4th Century AD), What he called as Prakrit-Sinhala is an ancient Prakrit spoken by many in South Asia in ancient times.

Wilhelm Geiger also came up with terms such as Proto-Sinhala (4th Century AD - 8th Century AD) and proper Sinhala (after 8th Century AD) for the developing stages of the new language.

The people in Sri Lanka who are known as Sinhalese today boast about a written Sinhala history that was neither written in Sinhala nor says anything about Sinhala, they boast about an ancient Sinhala history and civilization which is not mentioned anywhere in the ancient artifacts or publications or inscriptions as Sinhala, they boast about Sinhala Kingdoms which nobody, even Ven. Mahanama the author of Mahavamsa has never mentioned. They boast about a Sinhala Nation which never existed, they talk about a Sinhala race/ethnic group which came into existence ONLY after the 13th Century AD and they boast about a Sinhala country which neither existed then nor exist now. Just because their leaders, the Sinhala Kalu Suddhas (Senanayakes, Jayawardanes, Bandaranakakes, Wijayawardenas, Kothalawelas and many others) licked the bottoms of the British Suddhas, they gave the whole of Sri Lanka including the Tamil Eelam to the majority on a platter. Even then, the Sri Lankan constitution does not say it is a Sinhala country.

Today, for anything and everything, the term Sinhala is attached, Sinhala-Buddhism, Sinhala-Medicine, Sinhala-Roofing tiles, Sinhala-Rice, Sinhala-that, Sinhala-this, etc but before the 13th Century AD, why the word Sinhala is not mentioned anywhere?

Of course, many different races existed before the 13th Century AD, but a race known as Sinhala never existed.

According to the genetic study conducted recently, the people who call themselves Sinhalese today are having 70% Indian Tamil genes and they still call themselves Aryans.

It is absolutely hilarious to see a race which never existed before the 13th CAD claiming to be the natives and the sole owners of the Island Sri Lanka just because they speak a new language (borrowed from many others), they became a majority due to reasons we all know and since the British gave them the whole country on a platter.

Thursday 9 July 2009

Men who killed Mrs.Indira Gandhi

TWO LIONS AWAKEN : Shahid Beant Singh and Satwant Singh
Wednesday 1st of November 2006
Extracts from "Jhujhroo Yodhay" by Maninder Singh Baja


(Left, Right) Shahid Beant Singh Ji & (Center) Shahid Satwant Singh Ji

JUNE 1984 GHALUGHARA



In June 1984, the Sikh Nation witnessed the power-drunk Brahmin Indira Gandhi send the Indian Army, on the sacred day of the Shaheedipurab of Sahib Siri Guru Arjan Dev ji, to attack Siri Darbar Sahib, Siri Akal Takht Sahib and 40 more historical Gurdwaras.

They used many battalions of Army and tanks, and attacked the thousands of innocent pilgrims who came to pay respects of the Shaheedi of Guru ji, and many, many Sikh Sangat, Singhs, Singhnian, children and elders became Shaheed. Sri Akal Thakht Sahib was desecrated by tanks. This army action by Indira Gandhi burned in the heart of every Sikh. It was like a great challenge had been placed before the Sikh Nation.

The Sikh Nation was extremely angry at the action. As well as the genocide, Sri Harmandar Sahib had been dishonored and Siri Akal Thakht Sahib desecrated. The times of Massa Rangar had returned, and the Sikh Nation required a Bhai Sukha Singh and Bhai Mehtab Singh.

Sikhs saying Waheguru, sent Sukha Singh and Mehtab Singh to take care of Massa Rangar.

TWO LIONS AWAKEN

Bhai Beant Singh Malowan went to see some of his relatives. His uncle was called Kehar Singh and was very knowledgable of Sikh philosophy. Beant Singh was in a state of shame, mixed with anger and depression. He asked, "Uncle ji, will Waheguru send a Sukha Singh and Mehtab Singh to avenge this sin of desecration of Sri Darbar Sahib?"

While handing him a book on Baba Jarnail Singh Bindranwale, his uncle replied, "Do not greive, if you have love of Sikhi, then learn that giving your head, and taking a head for Sikhi are equal. After all, someone has to be the son of Sukha Singh and Mehtab Singh. They took Khande ki Pahul Amrit from Sahib Siri Guru Gobind Singh, went and took the head of Massa Rangar to stop the desecration of Siri Darbar Sahib thus became legends in Sikh History. We need to remember them, and become like them."

These words from his uncle were like a spear in his heart. Now Bhai Beant Singh was looking for a companion who would sacrifice all to avenge the action on Siri Darbar Sahib. Eventually Beant Singh's eye fell on Satwant Singh, who was in Indira Gandhi`s protection force with him. When he carefully approached Satwant Singh, the young Singh responded "Elder brother, for this sacred task, not only this life, but even if I have to sacrifice several lives, I would to kill a brutal murderer like Indira Gandhi!"

THEY BEGIN THEIR TASK

First Beant Singh and Satwant Singh wanted to see with their own eyes what Indira Gandhi had done in Punjab and at Amritsar. The two Singhs shocked at the scene at Siri Akal Thakht Sahib, made their minds up, went to Siri Darbar Sahib and did ardas, "Oh Akal Purkh, give us strength!"

After seeing the state of Sri Darbar Sahib, both Satwant Singh and Beant Singh returned to Delhi back to their duty. On 24th October 1984, Beant Singh and Satwant Singh took Amrit at a Gurdwara in Delhi. Neither were particularly knowledgeable on Gurbani, but Operation Blue Star and the legend of Sukha Singh and Mehtab Singh were foremost in their mind. This is what led them to take the blessing of Amrit.

Satwant Singh always had the late shift, and Beant Singh the early shift. They had to work out a way to both be on duty together. On 31st October, Satwant Singh faked a stomach bug, and swapped duties with another guard. Now they had to decide how to do the task. They decided that the best time was when Indira Gandhi was taking her daily walk. On the morning of 31st October, 1984 at 9am, as Indira Gandhi walked from her house to her office at Safardajung Road, Bhai Beant Singh shot her 5 times with his service revolver. Bhai Satwant Singh at the same time lifted his Thompson Stengun and shot 28 bullets. Seeing Indira Gandhi fall, all of her PA`s and ministers ran for their lives. The Indo-Tibetian Border Police commandos, who also guarded the grounds would not come close. Both Singhs shouted "Bole So Nihal, Sat Sri Akal!!".

The Singhs shouted, "We have done what we needed to, now you can do what you have to." Then both placed their weapons on the floor. Only then did the other guards come and arrest them. Both Singhs were taken to a room, and waited for a senior officer to interrogate them. While waiting, the commandos started swearing at the Singhs. Not tolerating this, Bhai Satwant Singh slapped the commando and a struggle ensued in which Satwant singh grabbed the commandos handgun. The other commandos started shooting at the Singhs. Bhai Beant Singh died there from gunshot wounds. Bhai Satwant Singh was seriously injured.

On the arrival of a senior officer, Bhai Satwant Singh was taken to the hospital. The officers wanted to know who else was part of the conspiracy. They did not know that these Singhs had acted alone because of the attack on Siri Darbar Sahib, Siri Akal Thakht Sahib, and 40 Gurdwaras, the Sikh genocide of Singhs, singhnians, children and elders, and inspired by the legend of 6th June 1740, when Sukha Singh and Mehtab Singh took revenge on Massa Rangar.

The Government had saved Bhai Satwant Singh's life but intentionally did not remove one bullet which was lodged near his spine which continuously caused him great pain. Despite this and other interrogation tortures, Satwant Singh always maintained that there was no conspiracy, and that the two had acted alone. He said, "This is our Khalsa tradition to avenge those who try to desecrate our holy places. We were happy to take this task. The Sikh Nation will be proud of us."

THE COURT STATEMENT OF SATWANT SINGH

Every court in the land, only gave the sentence that Prime Minister Rajiv Gandhi had wanted. Before the Supreme Court, Bhai Satwant Singh made a statement. He said, "Let any part of my body, after my Shaheedi, be removed and donated to anyone in need. However, if you need my eyes, let the authorities tell my parents. I have no hatred for any Hindu, Muslim, Christian, neither hatred for any religion. After my Shaheedi, let no Sikh throw any rock at any Hindu. I am not in favor of any retaliation or bloodshed over my Shaheedi. If we do create bloodshed, then there is no difference between us and Rajiv Gandhi. I am proud of the task that I did! I do ardas in front of Waheguru ! If I am blessed with a human life, then give me a death of the brave when I am hanged. Forget one life, if I could I would give up a thousand lives to kill dushts like Indira Gandhi, and laugh as I become Shaheed by hanging…."

(Translated by Zorawar Singh from ਜੁਝਾਰੂ ਯੋਧੇ By Maninder Singh Baja)

Saturday 27 June 2009

Anything for him - Few easy ones

1. Behave like a female, i.e. all the tenderness of a female–a man doesn't want a man for his wife! 2. Dress pleasantly/attractively. If you are a home-maker, don't stay in your sleeping suit all day.
3. Smell good!
4. Don't lay out all your problems on your husband as soon as he walks in. Give him a little mental break.
5. Don't keep asking him, 'what are you thinking?'
6. Stop nagging non-stop before God gives you something really to complain about.
7. Absolutely no talking about your spousal problems to anyone you meet, not even under the pretense of seeking help! If you think you want to solve legitimate marital issues, then go seek counseling with the right person who can give advice in either:
8. Be kind to your mother-in-law the same way you would like your husband to be kind to your own mother.
9. Learn all the rights and obligations of each other in your religion. Focus on fulfilling your obligations, not demanding your rights
10. Race to the door when he comes home, as if you were waiting for him. Smile and hug him.
11. Keep your house clean, at least to the level that he wants it.
12. Compliment him on the things you know he's not so confident about (looks, intelligence, etc.) This will build his self-esteem.
13. Tell him he's the best husband ever anyone can have.
14. Call his family often.
15. Give him a simple task to do at home and then thank him when he does it. This will encourage him to do more.
16. When he's talking about something boring, listen and nod your head. Even ask questions to make it seem like you're interested.
17. Encourage him to do good deeds.
18. If he's in a bad mood, give him some space. He'll get over it, in the name of God.
19. Thank him sincerely for providing you with food and shelter. It's a big deal.
20. If he's angry with you and starts yelling, let him yell it out while you're quiet.You will see your fight will end a lot faster. Then when he's calm, you can tell him your side of the story and how you want him to change something.
21. When you're mad at him, don't say 'YOU make me furious', rather, 'This action makes me upset'. Direct your anger to the action and circumstance rather than at him.
22. Remember that your husband has feelings, so take them into consideration.
23. Let him chill with his friends without guilt, especially if they're good guys. Encourage him to go out, so he doesn't feel 'cooped up' at home.
24. If your husband is annoyed over a little thing you do (and you can control it), then stop doing it. Really
25. Learn how to tell him what you expect without him having to guess all the time. Learn to communicate your feelings.
26. Don't get mad over small things. It's not worth it.
27. Make jokes. If you're not naturally funny, go on the internet and read some jokes, and then tell them to him.
28. Tell him you're the best wife ever and compliment yourself on certain things you know you're good at.
29. Learn to make his favorite dish.
30. Don't ever, EVER talk bad about him with friends or family unnecessarily. If they end up agreeing with you, you will see that it hits you back in the face because you get more depressed that you have a bad husband–and other people also think you have a bad husband.
31. Use your time wisely and get things accomplished. If you're a home-maker, take online classes and get active in your community. This will make you happy and a secondary bonus is that it impresses your husband.
32. Husband and wife should discuss and communicate with wisdom with each other to convey what they like and dislike of each other to do or not to do. Do NOT give commands or instructions like he's your servant. 'They are garment to each other'
33. Tell your husband you love him, many, many times.
Aisha, radiallahu anha, narrated that the Prophet , salallahu alaihi wasalaam, used to ask her how strong her love for him, she said like 'a knot.' And the next time he would ask her, 'How is that knot?' He also used to reply to her saying, 'Jazzakillah, O Aishah, wallahi, you have not rejoiced in me as I have rejoiced in you.'
34. Have a race with your husband and let him win, even if you are much fitter and stronger than him.
35. Keep fit and take care of your health so you will remain a strong mother, wife, cook and housekeeper, in the name of God you will not get FAT and frumpy.
36. Refine and cultivate good mannerisms i.e do not whine, don't laugh or talk too loud or walk like an elephant.
37. Do not leave the house without his permission and certainly not without his knowledge.
38. Make sure all his clothes are clean and pressed so he is always looking fresh and crisp.
39. Don't discuss important/controversial matters with him when he is tired or sleepy. Find right time for right discussion.
40. The way to a man's heart is through his stomach.
41. Always let him know that you appreciate him working and bringing home the 'dough'. It makes it easier for him to go to work.
42. Make sure you ALWAYS have something for dinner.
43. Brush your hair, everyday.
44. Don't forget to do laundry.
45. Surprise him with gifts. Even necessities, such as new shoes, can be gifts.
46. Listen to him. (Even when he talks about extremely boring things like basketball or computers.)
47. Try (hard as it might be) to take interest in his hobbies
48. Try not to go shopping too much … and spend all his money.
49. Look attractive and be seductive towards him. Flirt with him.
50. Learn tricks and 'techniques' to please your husband in intimacy. (Of course goes both ways.)
51. Prepare for special evenings with him with special dinner and exclusive time (no children permitted).
52. Take care of your skin, especially your face. The face is center of attraction.
53. If you not satisfied intimately, talk to him and tell him. Help him or provide resources, don't wait until matters become worse.
54. Ask Godto strengthen and preserve the bonds of compassion and love between the two of you, every day, every prayer. Ask him to protect that bond from Evil. When a lesser devil destroys the love between spouses, he is the most beloved of its spirit. Nothing works like prayer and love only exists between spouses where God instills it.
55. Don't EVER compare your husbands to other husbands! For example don't say, 'well her husband doesn't do that, why do you …' (thats a killer!)
56. Be happy with what you have because no one is perfect. If you want perfection, wait until you enter heaven together in the name of God and of course, vice versa!
57. Strive for God's love first and foremost! if all wives try to seek God's love and pleasure, surely, they can keep their husbands love too. And remember–if God loves you, the angels will love you, and the entire creation will love you.
58. If you pack a lunch for your husband to take to work, from time to time sneak in a little love note or sweet poem. If he doesn't take a lunch, leave the note somewhere else for him to find, like in his briefcase, or wallet or on the car steering-wheel
59. Wake him up for the night prayer and ask him to pray with you.

A Little description

1. Beautiful Reception
After returning from work, school, travel, or whatever has separated you.
Begin with a good greeting.
Meet him with a cheerful face.
Beautify and perfume yourself Start with good news and delay any bad news until he has rested.
Receive him with loving and yearning sentences.
Make hard efforts for excellence of the food & having it ready on time.
Beautify and Soften the Voice

2. Smelling Good and Physical Beautification
* Take good care of your body and fitness.
* Put on nice and attractive clothes and perfumes.
* Avoid that your husband observes you in dirty clothes or rough shape
* Use the types of perfumes, colors, and clothes that the husband likes
* Change hair style, perfumes, etc. from time to time However with these things you should avoid excessiveness Exchange loving phrases with your husband.

3. Satisfaction
* You shouldn't be depressed because your husband is poor or works in a simple job
* You should look at poor, sick, and handicapped people
* You should remember that real wealth lies in faith and piety.

4. Indifference to Worldly Things
* You should not consider this world as your hope and interest.
* You should not ask your husband for many unnecessary things.
* Encourage your husband to reduce expenses and save some money in order to give charity and feed poor and needy people.

5. Appreciation
* Remember the saying, "the majority of people in Hell were women because they were ungrateful and deny the good done to them".
* The result of being grateful is that your husband will love you more and will do his best to please you in more ways
* The result of being ungrateful is that your husband will be disappointed and will start asking himself: "Why should I do good to her, if she never appreciates?"

6. Devotion and Loyalty
* In particular in times of calamities in your husband's body or business e.g. an accident or a bankruptcy
* Supporting him through your own work, money, and properties if needed.

7. Compliance to Him
* In all what he commands you, unless it is prohibited
* In Islam, the husband is the leader of the family, and the wife is his support and consultant.

8. Pleasing him If he Is Angry First off, try to avoid what will guarantee his anger. But if it happens that you can't, then try to appease him as follows:
* If you were mistaken, then apologize
* If he was mistaken then: Keep still instead of arguing or Yield you right or Wait until he is no longer angry and discuss the matter peacefully with him.
* If he was angry because of external reasons then: Keep silent until his anger goes Find excuses for him, e.g. tired, problems at work, someone insulted him
* Do not ask many questions and insist on knowing what happened e.g. 1) You should tell me what happened! 2) I must know what made you so angry! 3) You are hiding something, and I have the right to know!

9. Guardianship While he is Absent
* Protect yourself from any prohibited relations
* Keep the secrets of the family, particularly Personal life and things that the husbands don't like other people to know.
* Take care of the house and children.
* Take care of his money and properties
* Refuse people whom he does not like to come over
* Be good with his parents and relatives in his absence

10. Showing Respect for his Family and Friends
* You should welcome his guests and try to please them, especially his parents.
* You should avoid problems as much as you can with his relatives.
* You should avoid putting him is a position where he had to choose between his mother and his wife
* Show good hospitality for his guests by arranging a nice place for them to sit in, perfection of food, welcoming their wives, etc.
* Encourage him to visit his relatives and invite them to your home
* Phone his parents and sisters, send letters to them, buy gifts for them, support them in calamities, etc...

11. Admirable Jealousy
* Jealousy is a sign for wife's love for her husband but it should be kept within the limits of Islam, e.g. not insulting or backbiting others disrespecting them, etc…
* You should not follow or create unfounded doubts.

12. Patience and Emotional Support
* Be patient when you face poverty and strained circumstances.
* When you face calamities and disasters that may happen to you, your husband, his and your children, relatives or properties, e.g. diseases, accidents, death, etc.
* When facing hardships (imprisonment, getting fired, arrested etc.
* Be patient and encourage him to keep on the spiritual path and remind him of Paradise.
* When he mistreats you, counteract his ill-treatment by good treatment.

13. Support in Obedience to God
* Cooperate with your husband and remind him of different obligatory and voluntary worships.
* Encourage him to pray at night.
* Support your husband's activities by encouraging him, offering wise opinions, soothing his pains, etc.

14. Good Housekeeping
* Keep it clean, decorated and well arranged
* Change house arrangements from time to time to avoid boredom
* Perfect food (preparation) and prepare healthy foods
* Learn all the necessary skills for managing the house, e.g. sewing
* Learn how to raise children properly

15. Preservation of Finances and the Family
* Do not spend from his money, even for charity without his permission unless you are sure that he agrees on this.
* Protect his house, car, etc. while he is absent.
* Keep the children in good shape, clean clothes, etc. Take care of their nutrition, health, education, manners, etc.

Anything for her - it is not that tough ! ! !

1. Make her feel secure, don’t threaten her with divorce.
2. Give sincere Salaams.
3. Treat her gently, like a fragile vessel.
4. Advise in private, at the best time, in the best way and atmosphere.
5. Be generous with her.
6. Warm the seat for her, you will warm her heart.
7. Avoid anger, be in Wudhu at all times.
8. Look good and smell great for your wife.
9. Don’t be rigid or harsh-hearted or you will be broken.
10. Be a good listener.
11. Yes for flattery. No for arguing.
12. Call your wife with the best names, cute nicknames, and names she loves to hear.
13. A pleasant surprise.
14. Preserve and guard the tongue.
15. Expect, accept, and overlook her shortcomings.
16. Give sincere compliments.
17. Encourage her to keep good relations with her family.
18. Speak of the topic of her interest.
19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is.
20. Give each other gifts.
21. Get rid of routine, surprise her.
22. Have a good opinion of each other.
23. Have good manners, overlook small things, don’t nitpick.
24. Add a drop of patience, increase during pregnancy, menses.
25. Expect and respect her jealously.
26. Be humble.
27. Sacrifice your happiness for hers.
28. Help at home, with housework.
29. Help her love your relatives, but don’t try to force her.
30. Let her know that she is the ideal wife for you.
31. Remember your wife in Prayer.
32. Leave the past for Him, don’t dwell on, dig into, or bring it up.
33. Don’t act as if you are doing her a favor by working or providing, He is the Provider, the husband is the carrier of the sustenance to the family.
34. Take the evil spirit as your enemy, not your wife.
35. Put food in your wife’s mouth.
36. Treat your wife like she is the most precious pearl that you want to protect.
37. Show her your smile.
38. Don’t ignore the small things, deal with them before they be come big.
39. Avoid being harsh-hearted.
40. Respect and show that you appreciate her thinking.
41. Help her to find and build her inner strengths and skills.
42. Respect that she might not be in mood for intimacy, stay within your boundaries.
43. Help her take care of the children.
44. Give her gifts with your tongue, be an artist with your compliments.
45. Sit down and eat meals together.
46. Let her know that you will be traveling or returning from travel, give her sufficient notice.
47. Don’t leave home in anger.
48. Maintain the secrecy and privacy of the home.
49. Encourage each other in worship.
50. Respect and fulfill her rights upon you.
51. Live with her in kindness, goodness, fairness in good and bad times.
52. Kiss your wife, foreplay, don’t jump on her like a bull.
53. Keep disputes between the two of you, don’t take it outside.
54. Show care for her health and well-being.
55. Remember you are not always right or perfect yourself.
56. Share your happiness and sadness with her.
57. Have mercy for her weaknesses.
58. Be a firm support for her to lean on.
59. Accept her as is, she is a package deal.
60. Have a good intention for her.
61. Cook a dish for her.
62. Designate a nice, clean, spacious area in your home for the two of you to pray at night whenever you can.
63. Women love flowers. Make a trail of them on the floor leading to the gift you made for her.
64. Give her a nice massage when she least expects it.
65. Send your wife a text message out of the blue with a message of love.
66. Send your wife an email without a reason.
67. Go out on a date or a get-away for the weekend in a nice location, preferably without kids.
68. Do something for your wife’s family, whether it is a gift, or a chat with her teen brother who needs mentoring, or whatever. It will get you lots of brownie points.
69. Do not keep reminding and demanding your rights all the time.
70. Shop groceries for her and call her from the store and ask her what she needs for the home, for herself or for her to give to people as gifts.
71. Ask her if she would like to invite her female friends over for ladies only get together and arrange for the dinner.
72. Ask her to send gifts to her parents and siblings.
73. Help her parents pay off debt. Send her poor relatives some money.
74. Write love notes or poems and place them in the book she’s been reading.
75. If she tells you something she had just learned from the Television or a book, do not dismiss her or ridicule her effort, instead listen to her and take her word.
76. Plant her a kitchen garden with all kind of herbs she needs for cooking.
77. Adopt a kitten for her if she likes.
78. Update her PC or laptop with a new one or get her a new mobile phone.
79. Learn to do a special massage technique and surprise her with your new expertise.
80. Teach your children to respect and honor their mother.
81. Be humorous with her when she makes a mistake in the kitchen (like when she put too much salt or burnt her baking).

Saturday 30 May 2009

Company Vs Family

Interesting.....Don't miss last 2 Questions...

Some, rather most organizations reject his CV today because he has changed jobs frequently (10 in 14 years). My friend, the job hopper (referred here as Mr. JH), does not mind it. well he does not need to mind it at all. Having worked full-time with 10 employer companies in just 14 years gives Mr. JH the relaxing edge that most of the company loyal employees are struggling for today. Today, Mr. JH too is laid off like some other 14-15 year experienced guys the difference being the latter have just worked in 2-3 organizations in the same number of years. Here are the excerpts of an interview with Mr. JH:

Q: Why have you changed 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: To get financially sound and stable before getting laid off the second time.

Q: So you knew you would be laid off in the year 2009?
A: Well I was laid off first in the year 2002 due to the first global economic slowdown. I had not got a full-time job before January 2003 when the economy started looking up; so I had struggled for almost a year without job and with compromises.

Q: Which number of job was that?
A: That was my third job.

Q: So from Jan 2003 to Jan 2009, in 6 years, you have changed 8 jobs to make the count as 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: I had no other option. In my first 8 years of professional life, I had worked only for 2 organizations thinking that jobs are deserved after lot of hard work and one should stay with an employer company to justify the saying employer loyalty. But I was an idiot.

Q: Why do you say so?
A: My salary in the first 8 years went up only marginally. I could not save enough and also, I had thought that I had a permanent job, so I need not worry about what will I do if I lose my job. I could never imagine losing a job because of economic slowdown and not because of my performance. That was January 2002.

Q: Can you brief on what happened between January 2003 and 2009.
A: Well, I had learnt my lessons of being company loyal and not money earning and saving loyal. But then you can save enough only when you earn enough. So I shifted my loyalty towards money making and saving I changed 8 jobs in 6 years assuring all my interviewers about my stability.

Q: So you lied to your interviewers; you had already planned to change the job for which you were being interviewed on a particular day?
A: Yes, you can change jobs only when the market is up and companies are hiring. You tell me can I get a job now because of the slowdown? No. So one should change jobs for higher salaries only when the market is up because that is the only time when companies hire and can afford the expected salaries.

Q: What have you gained by doing such things?
A: That's the question I was waiting for. In Jan 2003, I had a fixed salary (without variables) of say Rs. X p.a. In January 2009, my salary was 8X. So assuming my salary was Rs.3 lakh p.a. in Jan 2003, my last drawn salary in Jan 2009 was Rs.24 lakh p.a. (without variable). I never bothered about variable as I had no intention to stay for 1 year and go through the appraisal process to wait for the company to give me a hike.

Q: So you decided on your own hike?
A: Yes, in 2003, I could see the slowdown coming again in future like it had happened in 2001-02. Though I was not sure by when the next slowdown would come, I was pretty sure I wanted a debt-free life before being laid off again. So I planned my hike targets on a yearly basis without waiting for the year to complete.

Q: So are you debt-free now?
A: Yes, I earned so much by virtue of job changes for money and spent so little that today I have a loan free 2 BR flat (1200 sq. feet) plus a loan free big car without bothering about any EMIs. I am laid off too but I do not complain at all. If I have laid off companies for money, it is OK if a company lays me off because of lack of money.

Q: Who is complaining?
A: All those guys who are not getting a job to pay their EMIs off are complaining. They had made fun of me saying I am a job hopper and do not have any company loyalty. Now I ask them what they gained by their company loyalty; they too are laid off like me and pass comments to me why will you bother about us, you are already debt-free. They were still in the bracket of 12-14 lakh p.a. when they were laid off.

Q: What is your advice to professionals?
A: Like Narayan Murthy had said love your job and not your company because you never know when your company will stop loving you. In the same lines, love yourself and your family needs more than the company's needs. Companies can keep coming and going; family will always remain the same. Make money for yourself first and simultaneously make money for the company, not the other way around.

Q: What is your biggest pain point with companies?
A: When a company does well, its CEO etc will address the entire company saying, well done guys, it is YOUR company, keep up the hard work, I am with you. But when the slowdown happens and the company does not do so well, the same CEO Etc will say, It is MY company and to save the company, I have to take tough decisions including asking people to go. So think about your financial stability first; when you get laid off, your kids will complain to you and not your boss

Tuesday 28 April 2009

IS IT JUST FOR ONE EXTRA BEDROOM?

As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Software Engineering and joined a company based in USA, the land of braves and opportunity. When I arrived in the USA , it was as if a dream had come true.

Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would be staying in this country for about Five years in which time I would have earned enough money to settle down in India .

My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom apt.

I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feelng homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents every week using cheap international phone
cards. Two years passed, two years of fast food at McDonald's and pizzas and 2 years watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home. If I miss anyone then there will be talks. After reaching home I spent home one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting shorter I was forced to s el ect one candidate.

In-laws told me, to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After the marriage, it was time to return to USA , after giving some money to my parents and t el ling the neighbors to look after them, we returned to USA .

My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling India increased to twice in a week sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing.

After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl, were gifted to us by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked me to come to India so that they can see their grand-children.

Every year I decide to go to India ... But part work part monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting India was a distant dream. Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I couldn't get any holidays and thus could not go to India...

The next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had done whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents had passed away without seeing their grand children.

After couple more years passed away, much to my children's dislike and my wife's joy we returned to India to settle down. I started to look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my
savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years. I had to return to the USA ...

My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay in India ... My 2 children and I returned to USA after promising my wife I would be back for good after two years.

Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my son was happy living in USA ... I decided that had enough and wound-up every thing and returned to India ... I
had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom APT in a well developed locality.

Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the APT is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me and gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this?

My father, even after staying in India , Had a house to his name and I too have the same nothing more.

I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing. This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these children are losing their values and culture because of it. I get occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. W ell at least they remember me.

Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbours again who will be performing my last rights, God Bless them.

But the question still remains 'was all this worth it?'

I am still searching for an answer...... ......... ..!!!

START THINKING

IS IT JUST FOR ONE EXTRA BEDROOM???